• You may dip back into your past to find inspiration for what’s… More for Scorpio http://bit.ly/14DAKq #
  • jackbauerfacts: Chuck Norris always knows the EXACT location of Carmen SanDiego, but only because of the blood trail left by Jack tortur … #
  • Liamerven: something to think about. if scuffy the tugboat was from ohio. would that make him a cleveland steamer? #
  • Finally, a thunder storm!! Yay!!!! #
  • jackbauerfacts: Laughter isn’t the best medicine. Jack Bauer is the best medicine. #24 #

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  • Just left SPC; got student ID’s and text books. #
  • jackbauerfacts: Jack Bauer invented the Chronic Whisper Syndrome. #24 #
  • Eating Devil Dogs for breakfast. #
  • jackbauerfacts: Jack Bauer will never suffer a heart attack. Even the heart isn’t stupid enough to attack Jack Bauer. #24 #
  • You know what’s expected of you on the job now and truly want … More for Scorpio http://bit.ly/14DAKq #
  • jackbauerfacts: every time you masturbate, Jack kills a terrorist. #24 #
  • jackbauerfacts: Jack Bauer played football as a kid and thats why the ball isn’t round #24

    Tip: Reply with ‘off’ to silence Twitter. #

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  • jackbauerfacts: When Jack Bauer runs out of ammunition, he eats nails, shits out bullets, and reloads. #24 #
  • jackbauerfacts: The universe is donut shaped… but only because Jack Bauer punched a hole in the middle. #24 #
  • Patiently waiting for the results of Wil’s facial hair growth endeavor. #
  • You aren’t normally one to suffer a fool gladly, but today you… More for Scorpio http://bit.ly/14DAKq #
  • jackbauerfacts: Jack Bauer is the reason why Dr. House has a gimpy leg. #24 #
  • @jbb1260: She better. It might save her life some day. #
  • Yummy big brunch by Theresa featuring her famous cheese grits. #

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  • You can see well into the distance today and your vision could… More for Scorpio http://bit.ly/14DAKq #
  • thinlizzy159: Hurricane season. Be prepared: 1. All computers in off of back porch. #
  • How about American Woman by The Guess Who? Thanks! #
  • @djc500: How about Bridge Over Troubled Waters? Love you! #
  • thinlizzy159: FWD: You know u r a red neck when u go 2 the publix & ur guide dog takes u strait 2 the beer isle! #
  • 1/2: Direct from reevesman:
    A jack bower fact I just made up. Jack Bower never moves his bowels. He commands them to move and they comp … #
  • jackbauerfacts: Jack Bauer Climbed Everest in his T-Shirt and Shorts, in winter. #24 #
  • @byron27: Yum! That sounds good to me. #
  • New keg flowing for Mickey. #
  • @jbb1260: OK, I will. #
  • jackbauerfacts: If John Kerry had become president, Jack Bauer would have moved to Canada. #24 #
  • Heading out for another keg to continue celebrating Mickey. #
  • Just poured a second 32 ouncer in memory of Mickey. Goes great with baseball. Burp!! #
  • @wiljames: Mine better not show up there. I haven’t signed shit. #
  • @tallin32: word!! #
  • Celebrating Mickey with beer in FL while others attend his wake in Augusta. Here’s to you, Snakey! #
  • jackbauerfacts: Jack Bauer went to hell twice, the devil rejected him both times. #24 #
  • isfullofcrap: “Insisting on full immersion with SL is like using your dick exclusively to piss with.” Name the source. #slcc2009 #

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  • @arush: LOL! That’s what happens when you get up before the rooster crows. #
  • jackbauerfacts: Jack Bauer is the leading cause of death in Middle Eastern men. #24 #
  • You are driven to shine professionally now. You are often cont… More for Scorpio http://bit.ly/14DAKq #
  • jackbauerfacts: Jack Bauer does not solve riddles – he tortures the guy who wrote them for half and hour until he gives up the answer #24 #
  • The female Yankees announcer just queefed, or something resulting in an’excuse me’. #
  • Ehe Yankees have loosed a mega can of woop ass in Seattle. #
  • @ryanrain: Yes, they’re getting theur asses handed to them. #
  • jackbauerfacts: When Jack Bauer is around Chuck Norris Pee’s sitting Down #24 #
  • thinlizzy159: Jack Bauer ate Michael Vick & let the pit bulls have the leftovers! #24 #
  • @wiljames: Does anyone know how to reach the folks who made Jimmy Hoffa disappear? Michael Vick needs the same. #
  • Michael Vick: Sports role model for children? Thibgs have definitely gone to HELL! #
  • thinlizzy159: FWD: …..his wife pisses him off & it’s against the law to kill her! #
  • thinlizzy159: How in the hell can one neighbor fill a 500 gallon garbage can in one hour? #
  • Wings and fries from Good Fellas. Yummm!!! #

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  • My Daily Twittascope – Something that recently bugged you seems less than bothersome now. Perhaps you learn additio… http://bit.ly/14DAKq #
  • ryanrain: feel free to rt this, I’m looking for more spymasters, follow me and I’ll follow you back. #playspymaster #
  • JackFacts24: Jack Bauer would eat Mike Tyson’s children. #24 #
  • JackFacts24: Having sex with Jack Bauer has also been called “Lethal Injection”. #24 #
  • jackbauerfacts: Jack Bauer can beat the gay out of Elton John #24 #
  • My Daily Twittascope – Your lover, partner or friend may be annoyingly stubborn today — enough so to match your ow… http://bit.ly/14DAKq #

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  • Wil got staples out! No nore wound packing! Woo Hoo!!! At Ale House. #
  • @toonhead: We’re sorry for your loss. You are in our prayers. #
  • JackFacts24: Jehovah’s Witnesses once tried to convert Jack Bauer. After 4 minutes of interrogation, they admitted Jack Bauer was God. #24 #
  • @arush: No. They were very good. #
  • jackbauerfacts: If you look in the dictionary, it’ll define “idiot” as anyone who tried to cross Jack Bauer. #24 #
  • jackbauerfacts: When Jack buys a hot dog, he makes it tell him exactly what it’s made of, then eats it anyway. #24 #
  • @arush: What time did you finally take off? #
  • Watched Amanda’s plabe take off; on the way home. #

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  • @thinlizzy159: Damn! We’ll have to look out here cuz I; waiting on you. #
  • @thinlizy159: I gotta pee too. I love Skittles, especially the blue packs. #
  • JackFacts24: Kids don’t go to Jack Bauer’s house on Halloween because he only hands out cans of whoop-ass. #24 #
  • @jesicatrask: a new netbook. LOL! #
  • @arush: They better not piss or shit while we’re gone. #
  • @thinlizzy159: SC bones in Columbia velieved Civil War hospital amputations. #
  • @wiljames: NO!!! You can’t have one! #
  • JackFacts24: When Pres. Palmer started doing Allstate adverts, it took 43 takes before he could stop saying, “You’re in good hands with … #
  • Waiting while Theresa goes to the gate with Amanda. #
  • thinlizzy159: rt JackFacts24Jack Bauer got Helen Keller to talk. #24 #

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